Friday, March 05, 2004  
CLIT AND CLACK

Dry and tired, going for 90 on all fours six times a day, her hot little ass needed a lube job. She couldn’t get a date with her favorite mechanic, a man with a gentle touch and trustworthy advice. Apparently word is out and he’s all booked for the next two weeks. So she went in for a quickie at the first Jiffylube she encountered.

What fuckers, let me tell you.

So we’re single, so we’re young, so we let out a nice soft whir when the key is inserted; what is it about that description that leads the Jiffylube man to assume that we’re Air-Heads as well!?

When did the cost of a simple oil change jump to $65!?

WELL MA’AM, he says, pointing to a computer screen with vulgar cartoon-pictures of her insides as if to demonstrate his superior knowledge of her vital parts, THE RADIATOR WAS LOW, AND WE TOPPED HER OFF WITH WASHER FLUID.

Bullshit! As if I can’t tell when my girl needs a drink, as if I’ve never bought anti-freeze and don’t know that it only costs $2 a gallon, as if I’m not capable of mixing it 50-50 with water so she takes it down smooth. As if I didn’t JUST YESTERDAY feed her the cocktail till she hit her full mark and said Whoa, no more please. As if I didn’t ALSO purchase wiper fluid at the same time and fill her up till she spurted out in glee.

I spend quality time with her, I can sense her wants, her needs. I’m sensitive to her idiosyncrasies. And she responds to me, oh so sweetly and gently, and she likes the way I pump her brakes.

I blew a gasket, seeing her treated badly by a good-for-nothing man. I blew all my hoses. I screamed: I AM NEVER LETTING YOU TOUCH HER AGAIN. NEXT TIME, I’LL DO HER MYSELF, AND I’LL DO IT RIGHT!

and when I lift her hood, she’ll moan with delight, she’ll drip with fair goodness into the night, and later as she revs around a tight corner, I’ll know by her squeal that I gave her some pleasure.

by Zulieka
4:31 PM


   Wednesday, March 03, 2004  
hi kool kids

due to a special guest who will be in from out of town this weekend/week there wont be a new update to Lick this coming Sunday.

but that doesnt mean that you shouldnt send in your submissions.

if anything you should because Raspil will be able to take a little extra time (not that she needs it) to design your page better.

flow with some secrets.

flow with some deep down dreams.

flow with some super dark thoughts.

bust with the real deal.

Lick is such a safe place that i dont even remember who sent the stuff in, so feel free to let go and rock.

im not sure what more anyone could ask for other than great design and decent traffic and the sheild of the fake name.

i want to thank everyone who submitted last month. it was a kickass start.

lets make march just as good.

but so much depends on you.
by tony pierce
11:28 PM


   Monday, March 01, 2004  
Beautiful boy when you dance watch you dance and that is enough. People mover person it goes and so it goes when the first sunlight lifting you take me. I'm asleep with your smell, breathe me in.
by dehumidifier baxter-birney
4:10 PM